Opinion: Is asking some blacks to accept responsibility for themselves asking too much? A black man's view of today's problem and the solution

by Ken Raymond

Last month, I posted a description of my personal encounters with law enforcement while driving the streets, roads, and highways throughout this country for the past 35 years.

And just a little about me: I’m a 56-year old, 300-plus pound black man that has driven unarmed all of his life. And throughout the years, I’ve only been stopped by law enforcement three times: once for speeding, and twice for driving with an expired license plate.

The places I’ve driven include up and down the east coast from North Carolina to Massachusetts multiple times, as far west as Tennessee, as far south as Georgia, parts of the Midwest including Ohio, and throughout the Tar eel state.

And not only was I never pulled over and shot, I was never harassed by police officers.

I published my own personal encounters with police in response to a prevailing deception within the black community that law enforcement officers do nothing but oppress and kill African-Americans for “driving while black.” This belief has only intensified since the murder of George Floyd.

The response my post received from most African-Americans was vicious to say the least. Aside from hurling the usual slurs and terminology such as “coon”  and “Uncle Tom” (terms used by blacks to either keep other blacks under control or to hold them down), or my personal favorite, “You forgot where you came from”, I was called “insensitive,” “arrogant,” “narcissistic” and “blind.

All because I simply told the truth about my personal experience with law enforcement as an unarmed, black motorist. I’m sure many of them would’ve preferred that I said nothing, especially since my experience contradicts popular belief --and especially since they couldn’t reconcile their long-held beliefs with my personal experience.

I expected some backlash, but I wasn’t sure how intense it would be. After all, I was challenging a social concept guarded closely by many African-Americans and a traditional mindset that the self-appointed “gatekeepers of blackness” say that you must respect to be authentically black.

But the most telling comments came from a friend that I’ve known for as long as I’ve lived in North Carolina – someone I met at Winston-Salem State University and attended church with for about 12 years.

During our exchange, I pointed out that the reason that I’m not harassed by the police and the reason I’ve only been pulled over three times is because I accept full responsibility for my actions, my decisions, the results of those decisions, and the outcome of my life. I also added that I do not blame society or “the white man” for anything that may go wrong in my life.

And then I asked her a question. While the question was directed at her, the other African-Americans participated in the discussion could have answered -- but they remained silent. This was the question: “Is asking black Americans to be responsible for themselves too much to ask for?”

As you all now, it’s hard to determine someone’s emotions when communicating via social media, even with the use of emojis. But her anger came through very clearly. In fact, if there were an emoji of a character’s head spinning around on its shoulders, it would have accurately expressed her rage. At that time, she hurled more slurs and referred to me as “pitiful.

I deflected the insults and continued to press her. I asked the question again and again. And throughout our exchange she ducked, sidestepped, and maneuvered like a professional dodgeball player. And none of the other African-Americans reading our posts chimed in. And I couldn’t help but notice that none of the individuals that spewed insults towards me even tried to answer the question.

And therein lies a big part of the problem. There are too many African Americans who believe they should be able to enjoy the fruits and benefits of freedom without accepting responsibility for themselves and their actions.

But this is nothing new. Throughout the decades America has seen not only African-Americans, but many individuals, suffer needlessly because of their refusal to accept a big part of the price of freedom. They duck, sidestep and dodge, but eventually they get hit again and again with the reality that no one will experience true freedom if they do not accept responsibility for themselves.

I believe their refusal to accept this results from more than a lack of discipline – it exists largely because a collective lack of self-esteem which has been passed down over the years and reinforced by blacks themselves.

I believe this phenomenon exists largely because of a group mindset, a stronghold within their thinking, that tells blacks that they need special consideration to get through life because they’re black. This mindset keeps them from believing that they can achieve anything any white person can from a level playing field. And it causes them to believe that they need special consideration for almost everything they encounter.

Furthermore, I believe this refusal to accept individual responsibility is due to the erroneous elevation of victims -- and victimhood -- in America. To my knowledge, victimhood gained national momentum in the 1980s when Rev. Al Sharpton persuaded Tawanna Brawley to pretend to be a victim of rape by several New York City police officers – a claim that  was proven to be a hoax.

Sharpton’s intent was to use the incident (the lie) as leverage against the city for personal gain. Since then, too many African-Americans consider victimhood as something to strive for. In a country where nearly anything can be achieved through hard work, education, and determination, too many blacks try to leverage whatever they can by being victims.

Additionally, victims are automatically deemed virtuous, honorable, righteous, and unquestionable—four things any group of people would want for themselves.

The solution to this condition within the black community cannot be achieved through any legislation or government program. It also cannot be corrected by reallocating money from police departments into black neighborhoods.

The only answer to this problem is mind renewal. This type of profound transformation in disposition, thinking, and self-esteem only occurs only after an individual or group embraces what God says about them.  

This is where America’s black churches are failing. Unfortunately, many of them support the belief that blacks need special consideration rather than “I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me.”

But not all churches, black or otherwise, have surrendered the black community to self- degradation. There are those with the courage and the insight to help them correct themselves.

And, hopefully, their voices will grow louder as the months and years unfold.

Ken Raymond is an independent writer and researcher who graduated from Winston-Salem State University with a B.A. in English in 1987. Raymond is a former member of the Winston-Salem State University Board of Trustees.

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